American Apologies

Here’s another look at what readers think should be apologized for, as well as other submitted questions and comments.

1. “I’ve recently begun a new blogging cause in the wake of the recently passed Oklahoma legislation: http://oklahomahateswomen.tumblr.com. Mainly the focus is quick access to tumblr posts incensed about the new anti-abortion laws, but with a long term focus on highlighting social justice violations enacted against women by the state of Oklahoma.” - Submitted by Jonathan

2. “I apologize on behalf of america for creating a culture that is so self-absorbed it forgets there is anything else out there like people in need.” - Submitted by wearealone

3. “Our lack of intervention while there was genocide occurring in Rwanda. The claim that intervening was not an option because it wasn’t crucial to our national interest (aka Rwanda not having any natural resources that we could tap into).” - Submitted by andrewcapretta

4. “Was Victoria Jackson ever funny? Some might find this funny, but not the way she intended. I personally don’t laugh at nails on a chalk board… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWi182CMJY8” - Submitted by clintirwin

5. “Given your recent apology for reality TV, I feel it’s only fair that the Netherlands apologises for this, as it is our ‘Big Brother’ show - cooked up by John de Mol Produkties - that started it all. Of course, if any country is responsible for taking reality TV to unprecedented levels of human idiocy and narcissism, it’s probably the USA.” - Submitted by damanique

Here’s another look at what readers think should be apologized for, as well as other submitted questions and comments.

1. “alright, I’m done following you.  you’re skewed ridiculously, relentlessly, crazy liberal…your crazy lefty compatriots are just as bad as the conservatives that you decry but you skew against the conservative 90 percent of the time.   I mean, feel free to not flame both sides, it’s your tumblelog after all, but I won’t be following any longer.” - Submitted by schizocentral

2. “As an American, I want to apologize to the rest of the world for America’s failure to sign the Kyoto Protocol under George W. Bush. I’m sorry that America didn’t take initiative to pave a way for a more carbon-neutral future. I’m sorry that the United States has failed to legalize same-sex marriage and extend marriage to all, regardless of sexuality. Our country has just said, ‘Let the states handle it,’ letting them constitutionally discriminate against homosexuals.” - Submitted by obentomusubi-deactivated2010040

3. “I don’t know if you already covered this (if you have, kudos to you) “Purchasing” (It was actually stolen) half the Mexican territory. You can also cover kicking Taiwan out of the UN in order to get China in and into de G5.” - Submitted by dummiesforpolitics

4. “Creationists insist on attempting to put their non-history into schools. Not good. Creationism is something to be concerned about BEFORE it gets out of hand. Freedom of religion says its all okay, do what you want! Good, until that involves manipulating young minds.” - Submitted by funnylady42069666

5. “While working on a school project this evening, I somehow found myself on the wikipedia page for compulsory sterilization. I always knew it was a problem, but I had no idea how much the U.S. was involved. Everyone always talks about Nazi Germany, but shit! I think we have some apologizing to do…” - Submitted by Emily

Here’s another look at what readers think should be apologized for, as well as other submitted questions and comments.

1. “We would like to apologize for not knowing where your country is until we decide to bomb it. Of course, it should go without saying that just because we are bombing your country, doesn’t mean we can pronounce or even remember its name…or where it is. We’re sorry about that, too… What is important to remember here, is that American Idol is not our fault, the UK should apologize to US for that one…” - Submitted by clintirwin

2. “how about day time television? Maurie, Springer, Judge Judy (ha, judge that’s a joke) etc.you know about it. that is what we need to apologize for” - Submitted by writeorleft

3. “It kind of irks me that we’re apologizing. Yes, apologizing for all the deaths and wrongs and truly horrible things the USA sounds nice, but people need to not forget that China, Russia, Germany, North Korea, England - hell, practically any country used to/still commit horrible acts. Our country could be a HELL of a lot worse. Not to mention all the great things out of America. And to all the Canadians smirking over this list (I know you’re there)? Stop thinking you’re any better. You have plenty of assholes in your country, too, we just don’t hear about them because no one cares. Next ice age, don’t come running to us, fuckers.” - Submitted by Anonymous

4. “You could always apologise for brutalising the English language. Now I can understand differences in dialect and accent, but why the differences in spelling? ApologiSe and brutaliSe, please note. What’s worse is the fact that America pushes these deficiencies back across the pond, meaning that my spellcheck is, by default, set to the American way and I currently have horrible little red dots under my (entirely correct) way of spelling apologise.” - Submitted by rosalafae

5. “To the person who’s upset about the lack of English apologies: You are right, of course, but don’t complain about that not being on this blog.  It’s called AMERICAN apologies for a reason.  Maybe there should be a “world-apologies” or something, but that’s not this blog’s problem.  They’re doing what they started out to do.” - Submitted by therandombook

Here’s another look at what readers think should be apologized for, as well as other submitted questions and comments.

1. “Apologize? I don’t think so. This is going to sound arrogant, and I suppose in a way it is, but when are the English going to apologize for everything they’ve done? Are you telling me in London’s dual millennia it’s always been perfect? What about the Dutch or the French, the Canadians or the Chinese? How about Italy, they were some hefty slave drivers in their day, weren’t they? Every empire does horrible things, but it’s only in recent uber PC times (just about when the empire became America) that anyone considered apologies. America’s done some horrible things, but we’re by no means alone and by no means the worst. I don’t think we should have to apologize for being human and doing what many human beings would do and have done, because when it comes down to it there’s corruption everywhere and we’re by far not the first and we won’t be the last.” - Submitted by Jennifer

2. “Facebook (social media): The Wal-Mart of the internet. The one stop shop for all your digital information. It is capitalizing on the massive marketing information it can gather and slowly killing of many sites or forcing them to join and adapt to advertising on facebook. It is cluttered, addictive and being used by the FBI to trick and prosecute people. It is showing up in more and more courtrooms as a basis for divorce and custody suits. They are even trying to become the one internet log in.” Submitted by sverican

3. “crocs, uggs, and crugs…and ESPecially wearing crocs with short skirts. seriously, are you dressing for winter or summer?” - Submitted by danniebear

4. “I love your blog and admire your country very much - despite all the mistakes on the Bush era, it still is an exemplary democracy. But, honestly, I think you should apologize for the improvement on the world drug market, especially the mexican one, as America is one of the greatest drugs consumers in the world today and, indirectly, promotes violence in developing countries. That´s bad, bro.” - Submitted by bumerangue

5. “I have a huge problem with your apologizing for Phyllis Schalfly - really? She opposed an amendment that would have changed the lives of American women for the worse. If you read the proposed amendment, think of it in the context of the draft, for starters. I’d love to find a whole passel of American women who want to be included in that equally. Schlafly almost single-handedly brought down this amendment. That’s not shameful. That’s real American grit and determination.” - Submitted by cliffside

Here’s a look at what readers think should be apologized for, as well as other submitted questions and comments.

1. “why don’t you apologize for the fact that your apologies are extremely biased against conservatives. yeah, there are a bunch of shitty and unscrupulous politicians out there - but seriously, they’re not all conservatives. why don’t you apologize for the fact that FDR tried to rig the Supreme Court or apologize for Ted Kennedy period?” - Submitted by beecee16

2. “what about all the terrible american movies? First, the scary movies/date movies/etc. franchise. who’s brilliant idea was it to make terrible parodies of  mostly already terrible films and conceptions. stupid! i think i just lost brain cells thinking about it. Secondly, walt becker. the stupid director that brought such classics like “van wilder”, “wild hogs”, and most recently “old dogs.” those last two are especially cringe-worthy: two movies that sound, look, and come off in an identical way. a buddy adventure filled with slap-stick, cheap laughs and starring washed-up AARP-worthy actors(see:time allen, john travolta) and to top it all off he has four new films coming in the next two years, someone put a stop to it! Finally, the “saw” movie/superhero syndrome. how many saw movies are there? 6? 19? how many times can you reboot a superman franchise? how many times will the hulk series fail? the fact that hollywood is spending so much time and money on recreating old ideas and recycling stories and characters instead of hiring writers to develop new, original ideas is disheartening. please, hollywood, dont kill my childhood(and adulthood) love of superhero idols by beating them into a pulp.” - Submitted by Jim

3. “*sigh* What about apologizing to the rest of the continent for stealing the name “America” We are America too, you know?” - Submitted by elerinwen

4. “Fanny Packs…do i really need to explain why this needs to be apologized for? it’s pretty self explanatory, they are horribly unfashionable. :/ people, please stop wearing them.” - Submitted by milesfromyou 

5. “sorry for spelling things differently for no reason: Favourite/favorite Realise/realize aeroplane/airplane. sorry for not using the Metric system and failing to make the switch. sorry to visiting 18-20year olds who can’t go to clubs and bars when they’re in the states even though they can when at home.” - Submitted by spillyourhead

Here’s a look at what readers think should be apologized for, as well as other submitted comments.

1. “In disagreement with the submission comment about Playboy and hip-hop: The idea that you should apologize for hip-hop or Playboy is a bit ludicrious. Hip-hop started off in a good place. Perhaps apologizing for what happened to hip-hop may be better, but that still implies that the entire genre is bad when there are plenty of conscious rappers still out there, just less prevalent. Also, Playboy, in it’s beginnings, wasn’t that evil. Even now, they donate so much money and time into Feminist and Women Friendly organizations, that I cannot imagine truly harboring a grudge over Playboy. It’s run by a woman for goodness sakes. Perhaps women-on-women sexism needs to be apologized for, and why our patriarchy has condoned and even created such sexism. White privilege is another thing that should be apologized for, I can’t imagine anyone disagreeing after reading ‘Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack’.” - Submitted by andreaisace

2. “So, we apologize for a lot of Republicans. & that’s all good because there are a lot of stupid ones. But, try giving a shout out to the stupid Democrats to. They exist. I’m a moderate, and my Dad could get into this page but he is Republican and feels targeted by the ‘Liberal [leftist in his words] angle of this site’. Throw him a couple democrats to chew on; this is the only time his 63-year-old-self goes on the internet, EVER. Please and Thank You.” - Submitted by mj-hr

3. “Our criticisms of the Vancouver Olympics. http://www.salon.com/life/feature/2010/02/16/olympics_canadians_strike_back” - Submitted by Anonymous

4. “I would like an apology for relentless spreading your television throughout the world on the uneding mission to erradicate non-american programming. I for one want some UK culture back, oh and stop shoving your horrendous pop music down our throats!!!” - Submitted by adamprotz

5. “I think America should appologize for having a ‘queen bee’ affect. Americans like the leader of a high school clique seem to feel like they are the shit because they are the richest blah blah blah. They seem to have the same idea that ‘they don’t like me because they’re jealous’. HAHAHa they don’t like you because like a bitchy teen girl. America is a stuck up ignorant bitch. I love america but its true.” - Submitted by herestotheweekends

Here’s a look at what readers think should be apologized for, as well as other submitted comments.

1. “The Bombs We Left in Laos: Remember that time we went to Vietnam? Remember how we took a few side trips through Laos, dropping cluster bombs? Remember the twenty million tons of bombs we dropped? We sure didn’t. When we left, we left our unexploded munitions behind. Since the end of the war, over 20,000 Lao citizens have been killed or injured by our bombs. Most are children. Some are living in such poverty that they’re actively searching out bombs to sell as scrap metal. It doesn’t end well. Fortunately, we’re a wealthy country now and could clean up our mess.  Unfortunately, we don’t care enough to bother.” - Submitted by squashed

2. “Apolo Ohno is, no doubt, an amazing athlete. However, his shameless list of endorsements, participation in reality tv, and Hollywood attitude is a cornucopia of reasons to hate the United States. His representation of the United States seems all too accurate of most public figures from this nation.” - Submitted by thehappenstance

3. “You should apologize for the 78 days you bombed Serbia & Montenegro, for the 3,000+ innocent civilians you killed (http://www.beograd.rs/cms/view.php?id=201271). For supporting the Mujahideen in Bosnia and Kosovo, you know those guys you’re fighting against today. Not to mention the massive propaganda movement (you know, the “ethnic cleansing” bullshit) you supported in the 90’s that resulted in thousands of innocent people dying (on all sides of the Yugoslav war) so your politicians could move past your presidents BLOW JOB scandal. Maybe acknowledge the fact that Serbia, along with that entire region, saved your ass in WW2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k38N3ECODi8” - Submitted by deppaddicted

4. “I still don´t understand why the president of the most belligerent country recieves the  Nobel Peace Prize,just to defend  during a 30 minute speech that war is necessary.” - Submitted by carlosrodrigo

5. “American Apologies: ‘nuff said.” - Submitted by Anonymous

6. “Soccer moms, Hip Hop Music, Playboy. Apologize for things that need to be apologized for.” - Submitted by oc3ans

7. “skinny jeans :/” - Submitted by markgirl91

8. “I hope you apologize for Kid Rock eventually.” - Submitted by shaknee

9. “You’re a faggort.” - Submitted by Anonymous

10. “WHERE IS MADONNA!!!!! The UK may never forgive us” - Submitted by Anonymous