American Apologies

Before he was known as persona non grata, Rod Blagojevich was just a regular old Governor with terrible approval ratings. When in 2008, however, it was found that the Illinois Governor was trying to sell President Obama’s former Senate seat, the shit hit the proverbial fan for the cheesy coifed politician. Blagojevich was so confident that he was innocent, that prior to him being arrested he said in a press conference, “By the way, I should say if anyone wants to tape my conversations, go right ahead, feel free to do it. I appreciate anybody who wants to tape me openly.” When the tapes of his conversations leaked, it had him saying about Obama’s seat that, “This is a fucking valuable thing, I’m not just going to give it away for fuckin’ nothin’”, and that, “I’ve got this thing and it’s fuck­ing golden, and, uh, uh, I’m just not giving it up for fuckin’ noth­ing. I’m not gonna do it. And, and I can always use it. I can para­chute me there.” Blago tried to do damage control by getting his mug on every television and media forum that he could get his hands on. But ultimately, he was convicted and removed from office by a unanimous 59–0 vote in the Illinois State Senate. In a separate vote, the Senate voted unanimously to bar Blagojevich permanently from having public office again in the state of Illinois. There’s always next time Blago…except for in this case.